romance issues

True -- and I haven't spoken to him in over a year! (Some of my friends still keep tabs on him for me and I didn't ask them to do that, lol.)

Can I just say "Hurting again" For how I currently am for Romance?

JimmyB wrote:

Can I just say "Hurting again" For how I currently am for Romance?

Dude, you don't know the feeling of hurting. Go out there and live a little

Camus wrote:

JimmyB wrote:

Can I just say "Hurting again" For how I currently am for Romance?

Dude, you don't know the feeling of hurting. Go out there and live a little

BURN

NeverTrustAJunkie wrote:

I love this

I think Harbortown's up next?

JimmyB wrote:

Can I just say "Hurting again" For how I currently am for Romance?

Just curious: does it make you feel better when you're feeling sorry for yourself? I can understand your troubles (hell, I think everyone who ever posted in this topic really knows what heartbreak and other love-related stuff feel like), but I get the feeling you're not even reading what other people are saying. You just assume that everything is fucked up and that you'll never find a girl. But I fear that girls sense that sort of insecurity and lack of enthusiasm. Perhaps things would go much better if you'd try being in a more positive state of mind every now and then... I also had my moments of depression and no hope for the last few months, but at least I'm trying to do something about it. And I'm sorry, but writing here every once in a while about how bad things are for you isn't going to help you, especially if you don't seem to take notice of people that are trying to help you (I think that NeverTrustAJunkie already spent hòurs in this topic )...

NeverTrustAJunkie wrote:

I think Harbortown's up next?

Mingus beat me by a second.

Handsomely, I might add!

I have. I've resorted to quoting Lady Gaga and still, nothing has worked.

In all honesty, looks have nothing to do with attraction. It's attitude and personality whether you realize it or not. I once fell for a guy who my friends thought was totally lacking in looks. But to me he wasn't. I liked him because he was interesting, adventurous, funny and charismatic. That's what get the girls. Complaining just puts you right in the friends zone. And apparently in the "IDGAF" zone with Dimestore Saints

/DimestoreToughLove

next up: Plugga? Then Harbortown? I'm lost.



Also, can I start a "Watch Topic Issues" thread? I keep saying I don't want to watch a topic, yet the board insists I do.

I will stop participating in the madness and just let JimmyB ... be. He'll figure it out over time!

I stopped putting myself out there for a while. Rejection is something I'll never get use to haha. People take my quietness as shyness, but really I can give a F what they are talking about.

NeverTrustAJunkie wrote:

I have. I've resorted to quoting Lady Gaga and still, nothing has worked.

In all honesty, looks have nothing to do with attraction. It's attitude and personality whether you realize it or not. I once fell for a guy who my friends thought was totally lacking in looks. But to me he wasn't. I liked him because he was interesting, adventurous, funny and charismatic. That's what get the girls. Complaining just puts you right in the friends zone. And apparently in the "IDGAF" zone with Dimestore Saints

/DimestoreToughLove

next up: Plugga? Then Harbortown? I'm lost.



Also, can I start a "Watch Topic Issues" thread? I keep saying I don't want to watch a topic, yet the board insists I do.

I will stop participating in the madness and just let JimmyB ... be. He'll figure it out over time!

the watch topic problem is most likely in the codeing. Basically every time you comment on a topic it automaticly subsribes you too the topic, even if you click "stop watching this topic"
you're not the only person to complain about it. its was probably a simple over look

edit:basically you have to keep click un watch after every post, if it really bothers you, you can turn off email notifications in your prefrences...hope this helps

Ah ok. It just started up this week- or right after the New Year.

Thanks!

I'll just agree with these two upstanding citizens of the Dimestore Commonwealth and add my own version of what they already said.

Jimmy, it sucks that you're sad. However, this is the umpteenth freaking time you tell us. Got a date coming up and you want some advice? Tell us. Got dumped and you want to rant? Go for it.
But don't go repeating the same old, worn out "My life sucks because I don't have a girlfriend".

I'll put is simply: It's unattractive. You can only play the sympathy card so many times before it gets annoying. Not to mention what we've said so many times: Grow a spine. At least a pretend one.

Confidence sells, buddy. Try it out.

Harbortown wrote:

I'll just agree with these two upstanding citizens of the Dimestore Commonwealth and add my own version of what they already said.

Jimmy, it sucks that you're sad. However, this is the umpteenth freaking time you tell us. Got a date coming up and you want some advice? Tell us. Got dumped and you want to rant? Go for it.
But don't go repeating the same old, worn out "My life sucks because I don't have a girlfriend".

I'll put is simply: It's unattractive. You can only play the sympathy card so many times before it gets annoying. Not to mention what we've said so many times: Grow a spine. At least a pretend one.

Confidence sells, buddy. Try it out.

i agree

Have any of you had repeated moments with someone who you felt was close with you, but you find yourself unable to communicate with them anymore?

This doesn't really relate to "romance" specifically, but I felt it still sort of fit into this topic. My friend that I'm having this issue with has been a close friend for around three years now. I had a thing for her at one time, but it kind of deteriorated after a while. She's a good person and all, but I'm just completely unable to feel like anything I further say is has any worth. Placing the blame on one specific thing, let alone multiple, isn't really too clear to me. I wanted to ask if any of you have dealt with this problem, and what you might have done to try and fix it. Sorry if this is a little vague.

I know that feeling. Me and Plugga used to be so close but now it's like we hardly know each other.

I MISS YOU ILARIA.

Kosburn59 wrote:

Have any of you had repeated moments with someone who you felt was close with you, but you find yourself unable to communicate with them anymore?

This doesn't really relate to "romance" specifically, but I felt it still sort of fit into this topic. My friend that I'm having this issue with has been a close friend for around three years now. I had a thing for her at one time, but it kind of deteriorated after a while. She's a good person and all, but I'm just completely unable to feel like anything I further say is has any worth. Placing the blame on one specific thing, let alone multiple, isn't really too clear to me. I wanted to ask if any of you have dealt with this problem, and what you might have done to try and fix it. Sorry if this is a little vague.

YES. That's the worst.

Kosburn59 wrote:

Have any of you had repeated moments with someone who you felt was close with you, but you find yourself unable to communicate with them anymore?

This doesn't really relate to "romance" specifically, but I felt it still sort of fit into this topic. My friend that I'm having this issue with has been a close friend for around three years now. I had a thing for her at one time, but it kind of deteriorated after a while. She's a good person and all, but I'm just completely unable to feel like anything I further say is has any worth. Placing the blame on one specific thing, let alone multiple, isn't really too clear to me. I wanted to ask if any of you have dealt with this problem, and what you might have done to try and fix it. Sorry if this is a little vague.

Is the issue related to the thing you had for her or something completely else? And another question: is there a way to solve the issue (which would make everything OK), or have you just grown apart or something like that?

mingus wrote:

Kosburn59 wrote:

Have any of you had repeated moments with someone who you felt was close with you, but you find yourself unable to communicate with them anymore?

This doesn't really relate to "romance" specifically, but I felt it still sort of fit into this topic. My friend that I'm having this issue with has been a close friend for around three years now. I had a thing for her at one time, but it kind of deteriorated after a while. She's a good person and all, but I'm just completely unable to feel like anything I further say is has any worth. Placing the blame on one specific thing, let alone multiple, isn't really too clear to me. I wanted to ask if any of you have dealt with this problem, and what you might have done to try and fix it. Sorry if this is a little vague.

Is the issue related to the thing you had for her or something completely else? And another question: is there a way to solve the issue (which would make everything OK), or have you just grown apart or something like that?

NeverTrustAJunkie wrote:

I found that if the feelings weren't mutual then resentment sets in, which is followed by paranoia and arguing (not just about the other's dating life- you just get ticked off with them as a person). This is then ultimately followed by the end of the relationship, even the friends part of it.

The only solution I've found that works is if you don't speak for a long time. Maybe a year, maybe longer. Enough time that your perspective on the events have changed and you can just be friends. You'll always have a connection but it won't be nearly as intense as it once was. So like if they date someone, you might be jealous, but it won't consume you and eat you alive.

But, yeah- is there a specific incident that caused things to go South or do you think it's related to the thing you had for her?

It's not really about the fact that we're not dating. The reason why that fell apart was just that I started noticing that any effort really didn't seem to phase her. She also began dating someone out of the blue, without giving really anyone, let alone myself, any mention that she was interested in him in the first place. It just threw me off-guard. Nonetheless, I'm the kind of person that still wants to keep a friendship, even if there are issues such as that that come up. After that, I just didn't want that sort of relationship with her anymore, but being friends has always been important to me.

I can probably put some blame on the fact that we moved in together - we go to the same school, and we're doing the same thing, really. It just made sense since we both needed a place and I found a good spot in Atlanta. That seems to be a common thing to happen with friends when they become roommates, so I guess it isn't surprising. I discovered she's a massive hermit, though, and when she's home she almost never leaves her room. The few times I tried to get her to go do something with me it usually ends with me feeling like I should have left her alone because she doesn't seem enthused at all about anything, really. With another friend named Aimee, though, she almost always wants to spend time with her and I feel like if she were staying with her instead of myself, it would be a lot different.

I think that the fact that I WAS interested in her at one time kind of brought the separation. I really hate that because it seems like that ALSO happens to a lot of people - it's like they just think it's always going to make things weird, and therefore they don't really go out of their way to spend time with you anymore, unless there's ABSOLUTELY nothing to do. That's really the only time we hang out, and I don't like the fact that she only wants to hang out when she's bored, and not necessarily just wishing to spend time with me. That certainly makes me paranoid because I never really know if she ever wants to be around me in the first place, and trying to engage conversation, let alone trying to spend time with them with that on your mind doesn't seem enticing at all.

I could certainly say that the fact we room together forces this. I don't know if it'd be any different these days, though, if that weren't the case. When talking about rooming situations for next year, she seemed to automatically assume I was going to be her roommate (we're going up to Tennessee to finish our majors, and Aimee as well as another friend are coming). That kind of just did it in there, and I don't really want to room with her anymore when I repeatedly feel like I'm assumed out of the picture, or at least not being of any significance. It just makes me sad, I didn't really expect to end up this way with her, especially so soon.

I don't think I could ever move in with someone I once had feelings for.

Aside from whatever history you have, she sounds like a drag as a roommate and I wouldn't want to move in with her next year either.

NeverTrustAJunkie wrote:

I don't think I could ever move in with someone I once had feelings for.

Aside from whatever history you have, she sounds like a drag as a roommate and I wouldn't want to move in with her next year either.

Good point. Ha. It seemed like an okay idea at the time. I'm glad I at least kind of saw who she is from day to day. I think that's at least better than trying to pretend she acts like someone better.

Thanks for listening to my drama, guys. Now back to the music.

And wow, bad typo. By "automatically assumed I was" in that last paragraph, I meant to put a "wasn't". Probably makes a bit more sense.

Okay, this time, ferseriously. ^^